Personal · 7 min read
Unnumbered 1
This is Shifas.
If you ask him today, three years later, he’ll tell you he’s moved on. But the truth is, a part of him is still stuck in a school corridor, watching two people hold hands.
To understand how he got here, you have to go back to 5th standard—back when he couldn’t stand a girl named Lulu.
It all started when he joined 5th standard. During the admission process, Lulu also joined the school and ended up in his class. Back then, Shifas didn’t like her at all. She had a habit of reporting everything that happened in class to the teachers. Because of that, most of the boys disliked her, including Shifas.
In 6th standard, they were placed in different classes, so they hardly interacted. Then, during 7th standard, the COVID-19 pandemic began, and schools were closed because of the lockdown.
When schools finally reopened in 8th standard, there were only about three months left before the summer vacation. That’s when Shifas saw Lulu again, and she had changed completely. She had a huge glow-up, and her personality had changed too. She was no longer the same girl everyone used to dislike.
She walked up to Shifas and started talking to him. They became friends, and she became his first female friend. But before their friendship could grow any further, the academic year ended, and they gradually lost touch.
Later, Arav became friends with Lulu. Since Shifas was always with Arav, he naturally started talking to Lulu again, and their friendship was rekindled.
Before long, Arav and Lulu became best friends.
As time passed, Shifas slowly developed feelings for Lulu. His crush on her grew stronger every day, but he never told anyone. He kept those feelings hidden in his heart.
After some time, a misunderstanding arose between Arav and Lulu. Lulu texted Shifas because they used to message each other frequently. She was deeply upset, and seeing her that way made Shifas feel bad too. He helped resolve the misunderstanding between them. After that, they stopped texting for a while.
Later, another misunderstanding happened between Arav and Lulu. Once again, Shifas stepped in and helped them sort things out. This time, however, Lulu continued talking to him afterward. They texted regularly, talked a lot in class, and became very close friends.
Then Christmas vacation arrived, and somehow their friendship slowly faded again. After the holidays, Shifas continued texting her, but although she replied, she never initiated conversations or asked him anything herself. He started feeling like he was bothering her, so he decided to stop messaging. Once he stopped, she also stopped replying and never messaged him again.
Sometime later, some senior students secretly took Lulu’s photo, which made her cry. Shifas was the one who arranged a phone for her so she could call her brother and handle the situation.
Soon after that, a serious issue arose between Shifas and Arav, and it completely ended their friendship. They stopped talking to each other.
The issue began when a conflict broke out between their class and another class. Arav went over to ask the students from the other class what had happened, expecting Shifas to come with him. However, Shifas stayed back and chose not to get involved.
He may have had his own reasons, but Arav saw it as his best friend not standing by his side. That misunderstanding created a distance between them, and their friendship eventually fell apart. Since Lulu was very close to Arav, she also stopped talking to Shifas.
Before long, 9th standard came to an end. Throughout the entire summer vacation, neither Arav nor Lulu contacted Shifas.
When 10th standard began, Lulu would simply smile at Shifas before walking over to Arav. By then, they were part of different friend groups.
One day, Shifas witnessed something he would never forget. He saw Arav and Lulu holding hands while talking. That moment left him speechless.
Throughout all that time, he had never confessed his feelings to Lulu because he didn’t want to risk hurting either his best friend or his closest female friend. Seeing them together was enough for him to let go of the feelings he had been holding onto for so long.
Although he chose to move on, that moment remained one of the most painful memories of his school life.
From that day on, there were no more messages between Shifas and Lulu. He decided to remove her from his heart completely. It wasn’t easy. For a long time, he stayed awake at night thinking about her. He felt heartbroken, distracted, and emotionally exhausted.
But little by little, he forced himself to move on. Eventually, he stopped looking at her, stopped paying attention to Arav, and acted as if neither of them existed. That was how the rest of his 10th standard passed.
After the final examination, Shifas went home early without saying goodbye to anyone because he had no reason to stay. Surprisingly, after reaching home, he received a message from Lulu asking where he had gone.
He replied that he had a headache, so he came home early. She responded by saying that she already knew he would give that answer and wasn’t expecting anything different.
He still regrets coming back home early—without telling anyone, and without even saying goodbye to her.
Before ending the conversation, she asked him which school he was planning to join for +2.
That was the last conversation they ever had.
After that, the summer vacation began, and they never contacted each other again. Life moved forward, but even today, a part of him remains right there in those school halls.